Christmas; Different is Good

At the end of a long break, I’ve finally found the time to reflect on my first semester in Seminary, my first six months of re-acclimating myself to the American Lifestyle, and my first Christmas in Ponca in three years (plus my first Christmas Break in 6). So here goes, I’ll work backwards, starting with Christmas.

 (Me sharing the Czech tradition of lighting Sparklers with the kids at FPC Ponca City during the Children’s Sermon on Christmas Eve—“When we see the light we can understand what light is, just as through knowing Jesus we can understand love and our loving God.”)

Just as my first Christmas in Policka didn’t quite feel like Christmas, the Advent season in Atlanta and Ponca didn’t quite feel right either. Christmas seemed to come a little too soon for me, as we were giving Christmas concerts and having Christmas diners at the beginning of December, as if Advent was almost non-existent. I loved studying the Apocolyptic texts of Daniel, speaking of the coming of the kingdom of God, in my last Old Testament Class and translating “Advent texts” from Isaiah for our Hebrew Final Exam, but before I knew it, I was already back in Ponca singing for FPC’s annual Christmas Music Spectacular(Which was amazing, I might add) and caroling with old friends. I kept longing for Advent (Ironic isn’t it?).

I feel like I’ve spent a lot of my spiritual life “in waiting” so I feel very connected to the season of expectation and hope. This was one aspect of the Czech holiday season that I cherished. Everyone cleans house and bakes cookies and buys gifts and there is this sense of preparation in the air. Sure we had Christmas Plays and Parties and other celebrations, but certain things aren’t enjoyed until Christmas. Many mothers, for example, won’t allow their children to eat any of the thousands of cookies waiting on the back porch until Christmas Eve (Well, you can always sneak a cookie, but waiting is part of the fun). Plus the Christmas tree doesn’t go up until Christmas Eve. I think this makes the tree much more special when there are all the other decorations around the house, but all month you’re still waiting for the unveiling of the tree.

 So since something didn’t feel right, I tried to make it feel like Christmas. Like a good little Czech Lady, I made some ginger bread cookies, a bunch of them, and iced them and gave them to several friends and teachers. I didn’t catch everyone, because they had already left school, but those people who I did share them with enjoyed the sugary treats (mine had quite a bit more sugar and icing than the Czech versions:) I did get some strange glances at my interesting cookies, but I didn’t let it bug me, because the awkward replies always ended with a smile.

 Another Czech tradition I tried to replicate came on Christmas Eve with the Fish Soup. I didn’t know what I would do, since they usually use the head of the carp which ends up left over from the fried fish fillets they serve for dinner. You can’t just walk into Walmart and pick up a fish head. Well, maybe you can, but I didn’t quite have the guts to walk in and ask for one. Anyway, before I had to face that decision one of our pastors at FPC mentioned that he had some whole trout frozen in his fridge if I wanted them. Okay, so now I have the fish, no problem right? Well, every Czech soup has the same base, so I thought it would be a piece of cake, and I started off and the base was looking great, and I was quite hopeful for my success. I somehow braced myself to cut the heads off of the fish bodies(thank goodness he had already gutted the fish), and I tossed them into the soup. My Dad was like, “Shouldn’t you add a bit of the fillet to give it more flavor?” And I replied, “I don’t think so. I think they just use the head.” Well, I should have listened to my Dad, because it turned out to be the blandest soup I’ve ever made. Then when I talked to Anna Dus after Christmas, she said that she always adds a bit of extra meat to the soup to give it more flavor. Well, I guess it wasn’t all disaster though, because I still remember my sister’s surprise at seeing the dead fish heads sitting in a bowl staring up at her in the kitchen! Now that made it all worth it!

 When I wasn’t trying to relive my Czech memories, I was trying to practice the traditions I remembered from Ponca. I already mentioned going caroling with friends from church, and although we were doing the same things we always did, the people were new and the homes we visited were all different. Oddly enough, I feel like I knew every one of the “Shut-ins” we visited this year, even though none of them had been on our list when I last caroled 6 or 8 years ago. Knowing the people made each visit special and meaningful. Plus, the time in the van from house to house allowed for me to get to know some people from our church like our new Pastor and his wife and rekindle longtime friendships with people I hadn’t really spent time with in years.

But this too became a theme as everything turned out differently than I remember, and as I was standing next to my Dad and Sister, singing Silent Night and holding our candles in the dark church at the close of the Christmas Eve Service, I realized something. Christmas is always changing. We are always changing. And amidst all of this, God continually sends us the gift of love, peace, and hope, time and time again.

As I was pondering this, our studies in my Old Testament class of the Prophesies of Isaiah came back to me.

Surely he has borne our infirmities and carried our diseases; yet we accounted him stricken, struck down by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the punishment that made us whole, and by his bruises we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have all turned to our own way, and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. Isaiah 53:4-6

Our professor was telling us how these scriptures that Handel has attached to our memories as speaking ONLY of Jesus Christ could also have been speaking about the nation of Israel or even King Cyrus of Persia or even all who become servants of God, with the individual seen as a microcosm for the community’s experience. I asked her, “So what does this mean for us as Christians? Do we say that Jesus is the messiah in these scriptures?” Wow, what a question. I have to say this is one of those hard blows seminary throws at you, where it makes you rethink everything you’ve built your faith on. But it’s moments like this that you can take the opportunity to build that foundation on solid ground, better understanding through questioning. She didn’t deny that these scriptures match up with the experiences and the sufferings of Jesus, but she explained that the coming of the servant or messiah from these scriptures is something that is not “done or complete”, but rather something that is recurring and happening again and again throughout the history of the Jewish people, pointing out the Holocaust as a possible recent persecution and deliverance occurrence.

Happening again...and again...throughout history...As we experience disappointment and suffering, God is saving us and delivering his people, again...and again. These words kept going through my mind that Christmas night and it all became clear. The message for the Advent and Christmas season this year spoke to me of the faithfulness of our Amazing God:

As we change and the world changes and our traditions and surroundings change, God finds new ways to provide for us and new messages all to remind us of the same thing—He loves us. In this case, at Christmas, he reminds us that He loves us so much that he would send His Servant to bear our pain, and Deliver us, again, and again.

As we go into this new year, with many blessing and disappointments mixed with joy and suffering, May God continue to provide for you and deliver you in new and surprising ways:) Happy New Year and Merry Christmas!

CHANGE

Dear friends, I know it's been a while since my last post, and I apologize. It seems like I feel like I have so many things I haven't shared with you while I've been here, and everything keeps piling up in my head. So, I'll go backwards a bit, most recent first.

 I stand in awe of the recent election. I didn't really know if we were ready for this, if Americans would actually vote for Obama, the rock star of political life. I'm excited to have a President whose worked with the poor, been involved in community organizing and understands the forces that fight against the common man. I just hope people stop calling him "The Black People's President" and start calling him "Our American President," being that he represents every part of the American Dream--a son of a single mother, coming from a mixed background, breaking through the barriers of society to follow his heart. [I sure did enjoy impersonating my look-a-like Sarah Pallin on Halloween with Tim acting as John McCain.]

 Flanking this idea of our change as a nation, my surroundings burst with change as well. I have greatly enjoyed watching the trees nonchalantly changing amidst our comfortable sun and mildly chilly, damp air. I love Atlanta. And behind these visual changes hide the changes within the people around me.

Seminary becomes not just a graduate school, but also at times a wilderness, a battle ground, a treasure island, a boot camp, a summer camp, a mountain. I watch my friends wrestling with scripture, with the church, with each other and, more often than not, with God. God has called us all to be here, but many of us like Jonah, need a whale to get us to do and go where God wants, or like Paul, need to be blinded by God so that we may see, or like Moses, have seen our burning bush and heard the voice of God, preparing to share our calls and visions with God's people and the Pharaohs of our world. Just like the trees seem to be "in working progress", so are our lives and our faiths as we work with theology, seeking God's identity, so that we might find ourselves in God's image.

I feel like Policka took me through the wilderness, searching for ways to define the Czech culture and find God in CZ. As I got to know the people around me, I learned more about myself and my own culture. I'm coming to Seminary after I've already spent my time in the belly, after my eyes have already been opened, and after I found my voice to speak to the people. So if I've already come through the wilderness, why am I here at Seminary? Why am I returning to the mess of confusion, risking that I lose my way, be blinded a second time, and only run into more burning bushes and strange dreams?

Seminary may not be a whale or a desert throwing me into darkness, but it is definately the promised land of God's covenant with me. I'll say again how much I love the community around me. I'm still enjoying my classes. Old Testament and Hebrew make the Word of God and God's people fresher and deeper in my life. Elective classes that have me experiencing and thinking about church life and social justice. Social Activities that teach me about being a friend, being a counselor, being a listener, and being a prayer partner for my friends, my family, this seminary, this community, and the world. In fact, I know this is no excuse, but I feel like the reason I haven't been posting, is that I haven't needed to define the culture around me or release frustrations or explore my feelings. And yet, I'm missing out on the opportunity to take these steps again becoming closer with myself, my God, and my community. I want to continue with this blog to keep all of you informed with my life, but most of all I intend to share what I have been discovering about life, so that I can absorb the richness of these experiences and continue sharing them with you. Thank you for your patience and I hope all is well with you, for here All is well, all is well, and all matter of things are very, very well. Peace be with you!

 [Just in case you're interested to see the price of the cheapest Gas in Atlanta, photo dated 11/02/2008.]

Movie Night in Policka

OH! MY! I'm speechless! this is amazing! You HAVE to read Jeremy's post about the Movie Night they just had with 20 people and an amazing response!
Click here to read his post Movie Night!
I just have to say way to go! He showed a movie that most churches would never show because of the sex, violence, language, and dark content. In the US most churches would never take the chance of showing a provocative movie, just to initiate conversations about today's issues. But Jeremy says quite accurately, "Where is there a better place to speak about violence, injustice and blame: the Courts, with their very human view of what justice and reconciliation are, or the media, with their overly sexualized and entertainment driven news copies? No, it is the Church." These are the conversations that have to happen, and power to him for having the guts to do it. I totally understand his awkward pain in showing this type of movie in a church, but the question is "Why don't we do this in our American churches?" What are we afraid of? What kind of people would we get off the street if we WERE doing this sort of thing here? What kind of conversations could we start?
PS Punk rockers in the church, talking to people? I'm just speechless still! Way to go Jeremy and READ HIS POST!

Culture, Culture, Culture

 Culture, Culture, culture surrounds me and my mind has been running like crazy. I wrote this post on Sunday, but it didn't get posted, so pretend that the date says September and not already October:)

Last weekend I enjoyed some fun times with many new friends. Friday night we took a trip to Jazz Night at the High Art Museum. It took me a while to become acclimatized to the very modern jazz accompanying the classic 18-19th century art. What an overload to the senses! The next day we visited the Puppet museum in downtown Atlanta. They have a lot of Jim Henson's puppets, including this amazingly detailed puppet(should I still use such a passive word?) used in Dark Crystal. I thought it was scary in the movie, but close up he looks even more real. Plus he had a really cool sword.

This weekend seemed a little more low key, since we all stayed in on Friday to watch the debate. Last night, though, I went out with some of my new Korean friends to a Chinese restaurant, and wow, we ate such amazing food. My other non-Korean friend and I didn't really know what we were ordering, so our friend Teddy took control. I'll tell you, he can order for me any day! The soup we had was spicy in just the right way, mild at first and warmer throughout the dish, always enhancing the food and not inhibiting the taste. Afterwards we followed with a Korean tradition of going for the "Round 2," meaning that you go for dessert or coffee in some other place. We ended up going for some wine and had nice discussions about our lives and theology.

We have quite a few Korean-American students; some of them immigrated at a young age and others were born here, identifying with both cultures. I enjoy talking with them about their culture, meaning Korean history as well as the history of Korean Christians. Most of my Korean classmates work part-time(almost like full time) as youth pastors in one of the many Korean Presbyterian Churches in Atlanta. From what I understand their worship services can be pretty intense, and their contemporary services tend to be cutting edge. For the Christian Korean Community church takes a dominant place in their lives. Every morning, they take a special time of prayer. The Asian Student Organization on campus even started a morning prayer service in light of this spiritual discipline. I've been going on a regular basis, and we meet every weekday morning from 6:30-7:40 or so, having a Psalm reading, some singing, someone shares a short devotional, and then intercessory prayer. My friend Daniel describes the prayer time as a "symphony of prayer," because everyone is praying at once, some outloud and some silently, with meditative music in the background.
The first week found me exhausted from praying so intensely and so repeatedly, but now I find myself praying and praying continuously, and I even feel more comfortable praying aloud in groups. One of my favorite things about the morning prayer time is the routine and continuous practice of putting God and others first in my day. Many different people feel called to come and pray; although the idea comes from the Korean tradition, these meetings are all inclusive and people from all walks of life come to pray for our campus, our community, and the world. Again it's the wonderful way of how sharing your own culture or experiencing another's can change your own way of life and challenge you.

If you have any prayers you would like us to pray about, email me, and we'll pray for you. Maybe you feel strange with me making this offer or with the idea of strange people you don't know praying for you. Either way, you don't have to accept the offer, I just felt called to lay it out there.

So, I hope you have a great day and that maybe you too will have the chance to experience the habits of someone around you and be challenged to see the world through their eyes.

I made it!

 I just survived my first week of classes at Columbia Theological Seminary and I'm heading into another one. We've already had two quizzes in Hebrew, plus for my Wednesday class we're preparing a group presentation. I'm so excited about all of my classes. Old Testament has turned out to be more than a bible study, more than a history class, something more like Bible enrichment and history of theology. For my first elective I chose a seminar on worship and music. I'm excited about the way we will look at the history of worship in the church and how to find direction for churches in today's world--I know sounds right up my alley, huh? The best part though is that we have to do a project and write a paper, both of which scare me a little bit, but at the same time I was hoping one semester during my studies here to take an independent study in worship to do just this, and now I will be able to do it for a class with the help of others and then present it to people who could possibly use it. My other elective, another seminar, takes a look at the possible ways that a church can take on "public ministry." The professors presented an interesting syllabus to us, showing how we will learn about theory and then have to apply it to a congregation which we will study. I can't tell you how blessed I feel to be passionate about everything I'm studying. Discovering the meanings of Hebrew words and their double or sometimes multiple meanings, learning to read and asses the strength of activities in an average church congregation, being forced to think about theology and worship and God's abounding grace and love as I drink everything in from the wonder surrounding me.
 And yet that's only looking at my academic life. For the last two years, socializing always felt like work; some cultural or language barriers inhibited either myself or my friends. The "work" of friendship never feels wasted and becomes very gratifying, but still, it's always hard. So here I am, living on campus in the building in these pictures with several of the other students in my classes and in the community of roughly 300 students. We eat together, laugh together, study together, and pray together. I've been attending a 6:30am prayer service M-F, MTThF we have worship at 10am followed by fellowship and coffee at 10:30. You all know me and how I love routine and especially eating and waking at the same time. I've been eating with my friends in the refectory(shown here, no,that's not a foto from HP), whether I enjoy their good meals or bring my own, we enjoy each other's company and get to know new people. Wednesday night we had an awesome semi-spontaneous improvisation class lead by some of my fellow seminarians. Imagine "Who's line" where all ten of us were just getting up and taking turns in the game. Incredible, my friends are Hilarious! Plus, I will be part of a woman's bible study and an "intentional community"--something like a bible study, but God's blessings abound everywhere in my life. I could not ask for more.

On my way

 
Today I left with my parents and all of my things, heading to Decatur, GA. For the last month I’ve been preparing for seminary, unpacking and repacking all of my things, and visiting with friends. First I spent a little over a week in Madison, celebrating with my friends Jason and Joanna Cree during their week of wedding activities and the final big day. While there, I got to visit my Madison church, Christ Presbyterian, and participate in the worship again. It was so fun to see everyone again, and remember what a blast I had in Madison, and everything that inspired and prepared me for the roads I’ve been traveling for the last few years and the one I’m on as we speak.

 Next I came back to Ponca, to share my experiences with my church family there and hang out with my parents...oh, yeah, and pack up everything that I left at home. The first few days were so weird; it threw me completely off balance. You know, you can try to prepare yourself for reverse culture shock, but it’s so hard to know what to expect, to know what will “shock” you. There were so many little things that I couldn’t do like I wanted, for instance fixing my green tea and showering. I think my mind just couldn’t deal with the fact that I felt like a stranger in my own bedroom, in my own home, a guest in my parent’s house. On Thursday evening I gave an American version of a presentation that I prepared for Polička entitled “My Czech Culture Shock; the experiences of an American lady in the highlands.” I enjoyed talking about my friends and the Czech way of life, something I understood at that moment more than my old way of life.

After getting my fill of hamburgers, Taco Bell, and real Mexican, I found that I no longer have a taste for the same foods I used to love. In fact I never had a Chicken Fried Steak while I was in Oklahoma, because the thought of one, even now, makes me cringe. Believe it or not the thought of any beef makes me loose my appetite(for those of you who don’t live in Oklahoma, you should realize that despising steaks and hamburgers is equal to cursing or lusting in a Catholic church, you might just get sent to hell for having those thoughts). One day for lunch I even chose a soup and salad over a Philly steak sandwich. Shocking I know...what was I thinking...I think I’m becoming a vegetarian, so I guess it’s a good thing that I’m moving to the big city of Atlanta. I still eat chicken, but I like it less and less everyday. I think it’s because we just cook with different cuts of meat, heavily processed from animals full of steroids. Maybe I’m wrong, but I have a feeling I’m not.
So, tonight we’re staying in Memphis, and tomorrow we’ll finish the drive to Decatur. Keep me in your prayers as I go through more culture shocks and emotional growth spurts over the next week as I get all settled and start classes.
Also don’t forget to stay tuned in to Radost(click here), Jeremy and Jamie’s blog, as they have returned from their excursion across Europe and have been gathering their ideas to get started with classes in Polička. Everything’s just beginning!

Notes from leaving

So today I’m heading to Madison to see my friends Jason and Joanna get married, the Oklahomans are heading out towards Wichita, KS, and Jamie and Jeremy are heading through Germany on their mini tour of Europe before classes start(just like I did with Jacque and our friend Sarah Holstedt). This morning as I rode in my taxi, it took me past the Prague Castle and Charles Bridge, one last time, right at the perfect moment of sunrise when everything has a nice rosy color. I couldn’t believe my luck in getting to take a nice last pass through the city I love, with the glimpses of all the places I adore. It was painful to say goodbye to Pastor Jan as I got in my taxi and even harder as we drove away, but as I gathered my memories while looking at the sunrise, I was filled with thanksgiving for two AWESOME years. When I think of how my life and the lives of these kids would have been different, I no longer regret the pain which still exists in my hands.

Friday:Final day of class and weekend events click here to view

I’ve decided to keep posting on this blog throughout seminary and maybe even beyond that. What started inside me in Polička will stay with me and my next journey is only a continuation of the first. Please keep this site in your bookmarks I previously had started a second blog called Ještě něco, and I think I will use that as a way to let my Czech friends know about my new experiences, and keep up my Czech. Můžeš tam se pojdivat a upravit můj čestinu. Ještě nemám něco tam, ale budu.
Here’s the final group of pictures that I didn’t get to post the other night. A selection from the last day of camp, Friday night garden/church party, Saturday Day, and Sunday morning’s worship. Like I mentioned in my last newsletter, I’m empowered by the fact that as I finish this glass of wine, another is being poured. Jamie, Jeremy, and I are all recieving the fruits of new wine, and enjoying the sweetness along with the freshness. We may not know how this new cup will taste, but we’re excited to see what it’s like. Please have patience with them while they are traveling, and they’ll be in contact with you all towards the end of August or the beginning of September, with their newsletter.
Praise be to God for his guidence, patience, and faithfulness. Thank you all for your prayers and encouragements this week. We’ll be in touch. Until next time...za tím.